Don’t put yourself last

Maybe it’s a mom thing, maybe it’s a woman thing. Or maybe it’s just something that happens to anyone when they put other people’s needs before their own.

These last few weeks I have literally felt wiped out. It was to the point that my head was spinning and I thought I would pass out in my improv class. And then at home I almost dropped the baby. My vision even started to change. It seemed like I was losing my mind. In addition, I was so out of it I could barely keep up with posting on Hijabtrendz let alone respond to all the emails from readers.

What was going on?

I went to the doctor and had my blood tested and everything came back normal. I told my doctor that I wasn’t getting enough sleep and probably not eating properly either.

She told me to eat something with protein at least every 3 hours and that my vitamin D levels were extremely low.

I did what she said and slowly felt like I was recovering. Although now I’m convinced it was the combination of bad nutrition, lack of sleep and some kind of virus.

I want to say it gave me a life changing moment in which I decided to take control and put my health above all else. But, no, I’m still waking up to a teething/crying baby. I still have an almost 4 year old who gets up early and needs my attention, and I still have to juggle being a mom, wife, and running this website.

However, I am definitely trying to make sure I get to bed earlier, take my vitamins and set aside at least 5 minutes of “me” time.

This article has 7 comments

  1. Natalie

    Hi Mariam, I went through the same problem also. I am working two jobs and also have a four year old and for the past two months I kept feeling dizzy, lightheaded and also nausea. I finally went to the doctor and took the same tests which came out fine but also she told me that I had to take Vitamin D and also to start eating regularly and to lower my cholesterol. So I guess I have to definitely watch what I eat and also to start eating three times a day instead of one big meal and snacking all the time. Oh well, Inshallah we will take better care of ourselves so we can take care of our little ones. 🙂

  2. Kelly

    I’m so glad that you got your Vit D checked. I told you about it before (I tell everyone tho!), and I really think ALL hijabis should get it checked, esp if they live in places with a longer winter.

    I promise once you start taking the vit d supplement you will start feeling better, but it does take a few weeks. You will wonder how you lived without it!

    Regardless salamtik, I hope you’re on the mend!

    Life is like on the airplane, they tell you put on your mask first, before your children’s. Because if they don’t tell us, we will put it on the kids, but we will pass out if we do that, and no one will put it on us.

    The point: If you don’t take care of yourself first, there is no one to do it! It really seems so simple, we should all do it!

  3. alicia vict

    You are not alone..I think many women have this happen. I am the mother of 4 children ages 16, 13, 12, 11, and can honestly tell you I have had many days and months like the one you described. I also work part-time as a registered nurse and am married. Running a household and rearing children isn’t easy in a world where we must also be involved in so many things. What finally worked for me is letting go of the things that we really don’t need to get done immediately and really enjoy the present moment with your children daily !!! and then also set aside some me time if you can ..perhaps an hour or so every single day.

  4. Umm sou sou

    I think its a mother thing honestly. I think we turn ourselves into martyrs for our families and neglect ourselves. I have done this for too long and it has messed with my sensibilities but now I am dedicating more time to myself. A happy mother usually=a happy family. You have to find a balance or risk burning out. Lack of sleep, lack of nutrition, plus stress definetly leaves you susceptible to sicknesses. If need be take a break every now and then and rejuvenate. Just like you schedule time for family and work, schedule it to relax and breath.

    with all the love

    umm sou sou

  5. Nabeela

    I strongly recommend Julia Cameron’s “Vein of Gold”. This is part 2 of “The Artist’s Way”. You can read “The Artist’s Way” too, but I think you sound like you are somewhat beyond this and need Part 2.
    I don’t agree with everything Cameron says or all her activities, but in general, it is a very good & positive book with MANY helpful suggestions about recharging your creative batteries and living a more fully realized life. This book was recommended to me by some highly creative people, and I will say that it has had a very positive influence on my life. Even my husband has noticed a difference!
    Good luck and chin up.

  6. LK

    I think we as women just try to do too much and get sick in the process. I’m having the same issue working full time with school and still looking for a permenant job. Its like you dont have time to sleep!

  7. HijabiTopia

    I’m in the same boat Mariam 24/7. Constantly having to juggle my priorities, my kids, and my passion – designing, and let’s not forget writing! My list goes on and on! And being a type A really doesn’t help. But I seriously feel like I”m so burnt out from it all! I get those dizzy spells all the time from not getting enough sleep. I thought I was the only crazy one who wants to do it all . LOL! 🙂

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